5 years ago, I had a website that was pretty popular (600+ hits per day). Although today I consider most of the "content" on that old website to be pretty stupid (I like to think I've changed in a more positive direction), I was always myself, and I very much enjoyed the freedom of being able to speak my mind and do whatever the fuck I wanted to on my own website (within the constraints of the law, of course). Some blog topics were rather "taboo" (although I certainly didn't think so, but others would) and some pictures "questionable" (no private parts).

When I started my first "proper" job in 2006, I was forced to either take down my website or to remove all reference of my name (i.e. use an alias). The thought of doing either was very upsetting, however, I wanted a job and to get my foot into the adult world, so I ended up taking my site down. The very thought of writing under an alias was so repulsive, and I know some may think that that doesn't make sense... but I just couldn't stand my words not being mine. I am Modi... I felt like being forced to write under an alias was taking a sharp jab at Modi.

Fast forward a few years and a lot of life lessons, and here I am again (hopefully a little bit wiser this time around), keen to write/draw whatever is on my mind. I've learnt a lot about myself and I can confidently say, if a prospective or existing client doesn't like anything I have to say on my personal website, they can fuck off. I don't want them. I very much enjoy drawing cartoons with human genitalia sometimes. It makes me smile, it helps me deal with a lot of stress.

Before I got married, I wore the pants with any guy I dated (and thus I got horribly bored of most of them very quickly) and while I had total freedom of speech and total control, I also wasn't able to grow as a person, I feel in retrospect. I've been married for over 3 years now, and while I certainly am no longer the dominating personality in the relationship, I feel I have grown so much because of it.

There is a huge difference between storming into a friendly Chruch gathering and screaming "FUCK YOU GOD", and writing whatever you feel and believe in on your personal website. My website is my own space and as long as I'm not doing anything illegal, no one will ever again pressure me to compromise the content within it. I'm a cool kid, and I firmly believe that I am still completely employable to someone out there, even if they were to know everything about me.

That said, while freedom of speech is great, having a complete lack of censorship and lack of awareness of others close to you will hinder your own personal growth.