This commercial is so lovely, my eyes actually get really misty whenever I watch it and reflect on how life is going. The design and music is excellent.

I've been in my new home, in my new community for a week now. People have been very kind to me and I was thinking to myself earlier today, "Hey, this year isn't going to be so bad." However, my heart shattered when I received an email from my husband saying that he had arrived at his station (somewhere in the middle-east) and that is was quite extreme where he was, and that it was possible he would not have access to a phone or email for months possibly.

It's been a stressful many years, but that took the cake. I can live with being apart for long periods of time, because I can understand that someone needs to serve, but I feel like it will kill me if I can't hear that he is safe regularly. I don't know what to do, it's the most awful feeling, it's like, I can't breathe because the anxiety is just too much sometimes.

We both thought we'd be able to talk on most days. This news bundled together with some other dark feelings... it's just a bit overwhelming at the moment.

The other dark feelings? Years ago, when I first came to America to marry my husband, my old boyfriend went to my parent's house and talked about me with my dad. My dad told him how disappointed he was in me. This is probably the most hurtful thing that has ever happened to me. I told my dad in the past that I hope he didn't feel that way anymore, and that it hurt me to know that he felt that way, and he didn't say anything. A few weeks ago on the phone, he said it again. I honestly don't feel like I've done anything to be disappointed about in my adult life. As many problems as my husband and I have had, I felt like he was the one (and I still feel that way) and I took a chance, a crazy chance, but I followed my heart and tried to make a life here. My little online business is actually doing okay. I've learned a whole bunch of tech skills and more importantly life/relationship skills. I've learned a lot since getting married almost 3 years ago, and I don't think anyone should be disappointed in me.

I don't know what else to say.